Jacob's Birth

I don't even know where to begin...the past week has been a whirlwind. I went into labor early Friday morning, ended up having an emergency C-section that night, then my baby was taken to another hospital's NICU after having endured a stressful delivery. He had swallowed some amniotic fluid during the delivery and ate some of his meconium (infant's first bowel movement) but it did not go beyond his vocal chords- thank God. The hospital where I was at did not have a NICU, which was why Baby Jake was taken to a bigger hospital. I gave birth on Friday night but did not get to hold and meet my baby until Monday night after I was discharged. On top of that I was in pain and discomfort from the surgery. Needless to say, it was a very emotionally and physically difficult weekend. I found myself not even wanting to update people on Jake's delivery because it was just too hard to relive what happened and to talk about (it still is)...it wasn't exactly the most exciting or happiest birth story and was more traumatic than anything for me, Chris, and the baby.

On Monday night after I was discharged from the hospital, Chris and I went directly to the NICU and I got to meet and hold my baby for the first time. Chris had been able to see him the entire weekend, which was at least comforting. When we left the NICU that night, I had never felt more depressed in my life, as everything finally hit and I was able to process what had happened. I just wanted to go back to Friday morning and start over. I felt so sad seeing my baby in that incubator with blankets and things to comfort him that weren't even from his own home. It wasn't supposed to be this way. These were just a couple of things that were playing over and over in my mind that made me cry...I was going through so much emotionally.

But there is something about prayers and positive thinking...after finally going to sleep on Monday night, I woke up early on Tuesday with the determination to turn things around and find the light in the darkness. For one, our baby is ALIVE and actually quite healthy! He just needs to stay in NICU to fight off an infection that he acquired during labor and is currently on antibiotics (through the IV). He also had jaundice and was only able to feed through the IV for the first several days of his life.

So as of today, Baby Jake is 6 days old. He was born on 1/7/11, four days before his due date, at 9:40 pm, weighing 8.8 lbs (Yes, a big baby! That is why I ended up having a C-section). Chris and I see him twice a day and I can honestly say that each day gets better and better! I have had the chance to feed him and change his diaper and there are many more new mommy moments to come in the next few days! We do not know how long he will be in NICU, and as much as we want him home with us we know that he is getting the best care at the hospital and is getting stronger each day. As for me, I am physically doing quite well but still need lots and lots of rest and recovery. I am doing much better emotionally, though I learned that there are moments when I still have flashbacks of last Friday and feeling like I want to start the whole labor and delivery process over.

We have received so much love and support from our wonderful family and friends this entire time and we could not be more grateful.  We know it's just a matter of time until Baby Jake comes home and until then, we have to take it one day at a time and be thankful for each little progress made.